
                       ---------------------------------

                       * S A D * C A S E * C O R N E R *

                       ---------------------------------


Yes, the Sad Case of the Year awards  return  for their second year. This is an
award given to a person or persons that either really pisses people off by what
they write or makes them piss  themselves  laughing! In short- an computer nerd
or a literary lamer. (Nice phrases, Genie!)  Last year's award (read PB #21 for
all the guff) went to CHRIS BAILLIES for being an Amiga-lamer who knew fuck all
about the Falcon, and yet went into  the  ST  Fidonet echo just to slag it off!
The runner up for Sad Case '92  was  a  close  second by AARON SMITHIES who was
also an Amiga lamer slagging off the ST, but even less subtle!
    We'll be giving out a couple of  nominations  of our own in the next couple
of issues, and we'll be announcing  the  winner  in the next Christmas/New Year
issue of PB. If you wish to add  your nomination and reasons why you think they
deserve the title of Sad Case of  the  Year  1993. These can include stuff like
text files they wrote or ripped  out  scrolltext.  As  our award winner of last
year shows, they don't have to be involved in demos or cracking!
    So here's one nomination, and  there's  anothers  in  the other text files,
which will also tell you more about

***

DISCLAIMER: (1) The views expressed here are  not  neccesarily those of all the
                contributers to  this  or  any  issue  of  Pure  Bollocks  disk
                magazine.
            (2) To Powerman - this is not a  dig at your coding skills, believe
                us! Sad Case awards are only judged on what a person or persons
                say or write, so this  is  completely seperate to the Flowerman
                slag in PB #21.  If  you   have   a  nomination  of  your  own,
                and evidence to back up your  nomination  (eg text files and so
                on), then you're welcome submit it.

***

     SAD CASE '93 - NOMINATION NUMBER 1 - APPEARING IN PURE BOLLOCKS #22

This is a strange one-  it's  not  a  person  but  a  duo- but we think they're
equally sad, not neccessarily in coding or anything like that, but in what they
say. So we won't comment too much.... For  PB #22 we present the nomination for
POWERMAN and FLASHBACK JACK of The Wild Boys.

    NOMINATION 1 :      POWERMAN & FLASHBACK JACK OF TWB.
    NOMINATED    :      EGB'S SMELLY SOX
    SECONDED     :      FLOWERMAN


       ----------------------------------------------------------------

From Ledgers 3: 'PD Column' by STE of UNT

It might not seem like much, but it got Powerman and Flashback Jack annoyed!

<<  STATE OF THE ART DEMO - The Wild Boy- Powerman with a scroll text
                          by Flash Back Jack ..    >>


        ---------------------------------------------------------------

From Ledgers 4: 'TWB News' by POWERMAN of TWB

This is in 'answer' to the above, and it also notes what Powerman and Flashback
Jack did when someone sent them hate-mail!

<<  Ok- now I'll tell you about Flashbak  Jack.   He was pretty angry about the
    review of State  Of The Art  in  Ledgers  3-  because it said: State of the
    art- by the Wild  Boy- Powerman with  a  scroller by Flashbak Jack!  So- he
    has started doing  some designing  and  other  things for our new megademo-
    and I cant say  anything (well- wont say- I  can say what I want but I wont
    say what I can say because I  dont  want  to....) but some of his ideas are
    going to make this megademo one to look out for.........
        Flash was staying at my house a couple of weeks ago- and I got a letter
    addressed to Powerwoman!  When  Magz   of  SPI  called  me Flowerman- I was
    deeply offended..... but POWERWOMAN!  Now  that  really does take the urine
    (well if I was  allowed  to  swear  that   sentence  would make sense!).  I
    opened the letter and I cant  repeat  what   it  said (lots of swearing you
    see.....) but basically this guy was saying  rude things about State of the
    art.  There was an address and phone number  on the letter- so Flash phoned
    up (I was on the other phone) and a woman  answered (I presumed it was this
    guys mum).  He asked if this  guy  was  in-   and  she said 'no' and I said
    something like 'Tell your son he's dead!'. Flash  had a right go at me- and
    later we phoned up again and he told me  to  shut my mouth- so I didn't say
    anything this time........ it turned  out   that  this  guy didn't send the
    letter (so I'm very sorry for what  I  said.  I wont mention your name- but
    you know who  you  are!).   He  said  it  might   have  been  Derek MD- and
    considering what we  said  about  him  in  the  Wild   demo-  I wouldn't be
    suprised.  Anyway- the reason for telling  you  this   is because I want to
    know who sent the letter.  Own  up  unless  you're too  chicken to face The
    Wild Boys.......I dont  want  to  turn  this  wonderful   disk  mag  into a
    noticeboard for slagging people off-  but  this guy  derserves it.......own
    up- and I'll get Flash  to  round  up  the  boys  and   then we'll bust you
    up..........      >>


       -----------------------------------------------------------------

From Ledgers 5: by Tick of SPI

This tells us about all of the  above,  and also about Flashback Jack and TWB's
taste in music. (Note all swearwords were censcored in this article so it would
be acceptable to Budgie UK!)

<<  As soon as we had got in the  car Powerman stuck on Quadrophonia at about 4
    billion decibels, it sounded quite good  for the first ten seconds!!!! Well
    at Powermans me and Mikey or rather  me  and Mikey, well enough of that but
    we got out our new  disks  to  show  powerman.  He  also  gave us a look at
    Magnums Gfx ( well wicked, I bet  it  was digitised!!!!!! No only joking, I
    love the sprites for Powermans Game,  well  funky  ) also some of the demon
    X's music which was pretty good but  was mostly of Technoshot which I don't
    like that much. I also saw quite  a  few things for the Enterprise megademo
    and it looks like being a 2 disk job now! Well Flash BACK JACK ( he'll love
    that spelling ) phoned up at  about  12  o'clock and Powerman was trying to
    persuade him to come round in  the  afternoon  but Flash back jacky said he
    had his paper round to do.

    Anyway we ate lunch and then  flash  back  jacky  came round, he was really
    passed off about what the Untouchables had  put on their review of State of
    the Art ( I love it Mat, State  of  the  art by the wild boy and Flash back
    jacky did a scroll text, Classic ), well  I thought he'd be a 5 foot midget
    but he was actually quite tall for  such  a young duck head, he is actually
    still in school   (  the  fourth  year!!!!!1  Bwah  Bwah  Bwah  ),  well he
    imediately put on his Techno shot  and  turned  up the volume to full blast
    and started to jive  to  very  similar  sounding  tunes  for about 4 hours,
    listening to this stuff all the time makes you realise why Jacky is the way
    he is. He also came out  with  all  these  bullshot stories about him being
    followed by police as he and his freind had been arrested the other day for
    drug trafficing, what a load of  ballblocks!!!  When he got the shot kicked
    out of him at Lotus  Turbo  espirit  by  Mikey  he  said  it was because he
    couldn't play puter games on an  empty  stomach and was begging Powerman to
    order a pizza.

    Well we left at 5 o'clock and bleive  me  after a whole solid day of techno
    crup your ears really feel  like  shot.  Believe  me Matt i'd consider your
    self lucky that you've never  met  Jacky,  well  jacky if your reading this
    letter, ohh I forgot you can't  read  as  Techno has damaged your brain and
    you are a school drop out and  you'll  probably be dead anyway or in prison
    so you probably won't be reading this.

                   -----------------------------------------------------

    Well I have just read the ledgers  3  and  4  and  I have a few comments to
    make. Firstly I don't look anything  like  Doogie  Howser as was implied by
    Matt. Also I found Powermans article very  amusing, he was on about sending
    Flash Back Jackie round to Derek MD's  house  to kill him. Well if you have
    met Flash back Jackie you will know why  this  is funny, I mean what's a 14
    year old teenie bopper gonna do  to  someone  ?  well I suppose being Flash
    back Jackie he  could  always  ballshot  Derek  to  death.  Here's  how the
    conversation would go:

    Jackie: Well Derek your history mate,  me  and  my mafia brothers are gonna
            break your kneecaps, I have a  2  foot  flick knife in my pocket, a
            concealed one at that, I  almost  got  caught by the pigs yesterday
            for smuggling drugs through from Brazil coz i'm a drug barron mate,
            I also have my five bodygaurd  positioned  on roof tops to shot you
            if you should make any movement.

    By this time derek would  have  heard  enough  ballshot  to make him commit
    suicide by impailing himself on a large spike.    >>

     --------------------------------------------------------------------

"Day in the life of Flashback Jack" - article in Ledgers 6

<<  A day in the life of Flashbak Jack of The Wild Boys
    ---------------------------------------------------

    Yep, its all completely true, no  wonder  Flash  hasnt  got time to do more
    than a scroll text on the Wild Boys demos ! .. By the way Flash, you should
    watch what you say about us, your  threat  scared the poor old Equaliser so
    much he only goes out under cover of darkness in a heavy disguise now !

    Mat !



    Monday, November 4, 1991
    ------------------------

    06.00   Got out of bed, had a wash, a piss, a shit and some breakfast.  Got
            a big  job  on  today,  a  hit  to  be  precise  downtown  in  west
            London..... better get all my equipment ready, the hit goes down at
            09.00 hours. Shit!  My 9mm automatic  is  busted, I'll have to give
            Nick a call and see if he can do  the job for me, he's just got out
            of jail for selling puff,  so  he  might  not want to get involved.
            Hang on a  sec... 995 3663......bring....bring.....click.....Hello.
            Hey yo man its Flash here,  whats  happenin?  "Hey man, why you run
            off dat day me and you were  down  Acton Town selling puff, I did 2
            years in prison cos a you,  you're  a dead man Flash, dead........"
            brrrrrrrrr.   Oh well, what a  sore  loser,  I'll  just have to get
            someone else to do it.......

    08.00   Good news, I got someone to take  the  hit for me, which means I've
            got some time today to do that  bank job I've been planning.  First
            thing I gotta do is round up some mates......

    08.30   Ok, a few of my mates are now  at my house, and we're off to school
            but only so that  no-one  will  get  suspicous.  At lunchtime we're
            gonna go down National and  Provincial........we might visit Dixons
            while we're at it.......

    08.40   Got on the bus.  Loads of kids from  my school were on the bus, you
            can tell by the disgustingly  ugly  green  blazers we have to wear.
            Shit, some guy from my school is  getting beaten up by someone from
            Nower Hill school.......gees man, all these guys from my school are
            such wimps, except me and my mates  of course.  Theres an old woman
            standing by the doors waiting to get off the bus, I've got an idea.
            Boof!!!!!!  Hehehe, I just kicked  the  old  woman  out of the bus!
            Ha!

    09.00   Arrived at school, Rick of KLF  is  hanging around outside with his
            pit-bull terrier, probably trying to  pick  up little boys like me,
            better try and avoid him.......  [No,  I  don't  know what the fuck
            they're on about either! -EGBSS]

    09.30   I'm now behind the bike sheds smoking snouts......I hope I dont get
            caught this time or I'll have  to  chip down Powermans house like I
            did last time so that I  dont  have  to  face  my dad when he finds
            out..... wooooo,woooo,woooo   shit man, thats  the radic, they must
            have found out that I  was  behind  the  hit  which went down a few
            minutes ago, I'm outta  here........  [radic  =  polis  in case you
            haven't guessed. -EGBSS]

    10.00   I'm safe, the radic came round and asked a few questions, but I was
            no where to be found.  I better  lay low for while, theres gonna be
            a lot of heat on the streets after this morning.......

    11.00   In an hours time I'll round up  the  gang  to do that bank job, but
            its now morning break and I've got a chance to sell some 'stuff' to
            all the  kids.........stuff  like  puff  of  course  (snout, grass,
            gunga, coke, you name it I got it) and car radios, videos etc......

    12.00   Rounded up the gang, and we're  off  down the high street.  Firstly
            though, I  gotta  get  a  get-away-car.   I  know,  I'll  phone  my
            wonderful  and  amazing  cousin  Powerman!    081  922  6671  Bring
            Bring.....click.... Yo whats up.........Yo man its Flash, I need ya
            to come round, I'm gonna do  a  bank  job and I need a car.........
            "Fuck off" .......click... Ah well,  I'll  just  have to nick a car
            then.   Right,  car  park,  thats  where  to  go.   Hmmm,  a  mini,
            naaaaa..........Skoda,   naaaa........yes,   I'll   have   some   a
            this.......an RS Turbo,  very  nice.........boof!!  Wooo  Wooo Wooo
            shit man, the alarms gone off!  Quick, get in the car lads!  Right,
            I'll just hot wire it and  we're  off.  Brrum!  Bruuum! Shit, which
            one is first?  This  one  I  think............"Thief!  Yo come back
            here with my car you little bustop!"

    13.00   Managed to get away in the stolen car, we're now parked outside the
            bank,   and   we're   just    about    to    go   in.    Masks   on
            everyone........right,  just  a  minute  while   I  load  this  M16
            automatic........Ok lads, lets do  it...........Oh  shit!  What the
            hell?  Its closed! "Maybe thats because its lunchtime Flash......."
            who asked you you fat dick..... We'll do Dixons then.......

    14.00   We're now outside Dixons, and  after  waiting  for the staff to get
            back from lunch, we are  ready  to go in........Boof!!!!  Gimme all
            that money now!  Move it,  come  on  come  on  I  aint got all day!
            Shit! Does that Lynx come with a power supply?  I saw one just like
            it  the  other  day  for  twice   that!   I'll  have  one  of  them
            please.........thats 100 pounds please...........heres two fifties,
            thanks a lot...... "Hey Flash,  why  did  you pay for that?"  What,
            you expect me to steal it?  Gees.......

    17.00   Got back from school, still a lot of heat around, but I'm safe.....

    17.35   Watched Neighbours

    18.00   Watched Home and Away

    19.00   Left my house to  meet  some  of  my  mates  at Acton Town station.
            We're gonna try and sell some  puff we gotta get rid off.......hope
            the radic dont come round again......

    19.30   No luck yet, nobody  seems  to  be  interested.  Whats thats sound?
            Jeeesus!  Lets get the fuck  out  of here.......... "Ok man, you're
            under arrest, spread em!"   Shit, I'm  under arrest, wait a minute,
            I've got an idea.  Boooooof!   Haaha,  just  kicked that pig in the
            dick, I better run for it.

    20.00   I'm at Powermans house after being  chased  by the police but I was
            faster than them.   Wow!   Powermans  been  showing  me some wicked
            stuff from Hardcore Dancefloor 2.   Better  get  home before my mum
            starts to wonder where I am.

    21.00   Got home.  Well, this  is  it,  thats  a  typical  day  of my life.
            Tommorrow I've got another hit  on,  plus a few muggings......but I
            dont want to bore you with any more of my very boring life.

    00.00   Good night!

    Newsflash:  at this moment news  has  come  in  that  Flashbak  Jack of the
                infamous Wild Boys based in  London  has fled the country after
                XTC tablets and other drugs were found at his home.  He is also
                wanted on several attempted  murder  charges  and worst of all,
                not doing any work for The Wild Boys, most notable in the State
                Of The Art  megademo  in  which  he  only  did  2 scrollers and
                designed 1 screen.  A spokesperson  from The Wild Boys wouldn't
                comment on the matter......more news as it arrives......   >>

     --------------------------------------------------------------------

Scrolltext from intro to Ledgers 9- written by Spy of (then) TUC.

<<  HELLO THIS IS THE SPY OF TUC TYPING  HERE.  WELL I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS SHORT
    INTRO THAT THE ARGONAUT DID. WE DECIDED TO  DO THIS SCREEN WHEN WE SAW THAT
    REALLY CRAP ATTEMPT AT TRIDI BY THE  POWERMAN  ON LEDGERS SEVEN (DISK A), I
    MEAN IT WAS PRETTY POOR DON'T YOU  THINK?  ANYWAY I'D BETTER NOT GO TOO FAR
    WITH SLAGGING COZ HE  MIGHT  ACTUALLY  COME  BACK  TO  THE  ST SCENE AND DO
    SOMETHING GOOD, BUT I DOUBT IT. ......   I  CODED THIS SCREEN WITH A BIT OF
    HELP FROM EQUINOX, THEY DON'T  ACTUALLY  REALISE  THAT  THEY HELPED ME, BUT
    THEY DID. I LOOKED  AT  CODE,  BUT  I  GAVE  CREDIT.  MIND YOU, THE POLYGON
    ERASING IS MY OWN METHOD, AND  SO  IS  THE TRIDI CALCULATIONS (98 PERCENT).
    ........ BY THE WAY HEY POWERMAN (IF YOU SEE THIS), THEN I CAN IMAGINE THAT
    YOUR FILLED TRIDI WILL GAIN SPEED, AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T LOOK AT OTHERS CODE,
    BUT PAYED FOR IT WITH SHIT RESULTS! NICE RASTER FX THOUGH!    >>

     --------------------------------------------------------------------

"Mutant Monthly 6" by Tick of SPI from Ledgers issue 7

<<  What the folk is happening to the enterprise  ? ...... So who's left ? Well
    there's the wild Boys, then I get a call from Dan telling me that they have
    gone to the amiga, Dan said  he  got  this  bit  of  gossip off Matt of the
    Untouchables. Frankly I don't beleive it  at  all, but who knows ..... Well
    as for me not beleiving the bit  about  Powerwoman and the rest of the Wild
    boys going to the Ameoba, I am sorry  MAtt!!!!! I rang up Powerwoman and he
    said it was true, here's how the conversation went :

    Rob         : Hello Neil, I've been hearing a few funny stories recently.
    Powerwoman  : L..l...l..li..like  w..w.....what ?]
    Rob         : I hear your an ameoba owner !!!!!!!
    Powerwoman  : Y...y...yes i..it  i...i....s true.
    Rob         : Why ?
    Powerwoman  : Coz t..t..the a..a..ameobe i...i...s m.m..much better.
    Rob         : Has jackie got an amiga then ?
    Powerwoman  : Not at the moment, but I  am  gonna  buy  him one for Xmas in
                  exchange for sexual favours!!!!!!!

    This means the end of the  Wild  Boys  and  the  end of the enterprise, the
    enterprise megademo would have been  pretty  shot anyway. Probably about as
    orriginal as the state of the art  demo  but with orriginal coding and Gfx.
    Oh yeah the reason for all the  fullstop  things in Powerwomans text is coz
    he has a speach impediment, not coz I've got a dodgey keyboard on my Ste.

    Actually I have to thank Powerwoman as he  has given me agreat idea for the
    Split Infinity Megademo. Just look out for the screens dedicated to him and
    MAtt of the Untouchables, they should be  very  funny if you know these two
    guys ( prat in Powerwomans case ).    >>

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------

Response from POWERMAN in Ledgers 10- I don't know if it's serious though, when
groups keeps slagging each other  it  always  seems  to  get down to this level
anyway!

<<  Waffle by Powerman of TWB
    -------------------------

    Hi boyeeeees, Powerman is in  the  place  and  this  time I'm talking about
    nothing in particular, I dont  even  know  what  this article is about, I'm
    making it up as I go which is why its called 'waffle'.........anyway, there
    is a reason for this, I'll  be  giving  some  coding tips and talking about
    some important things a  bit  later.......firstly  let  me  say that Slam -
    Another Hardcore Jam should be out now, or will be out very soon.......I've
    just been reading Mutant Monthly 6  in  Ledgers  7,  and if you want to see
    what I have to say to the Dick  of  Split  Infinity (or what was SPI, I bet
    they organised a copy party and  all  the  members saw what the Dick looked
    like and said 'we outta  here').   Anyway,  if  you  want our response, get
    Slam.........I wont say anything here  because  Mat  would have to spend at
    least a week  editing  all  the  swear  words,  so  get  Slam  and read the
    scroller........Flashbak Jack came round yesterday  in  175 grands worth of
    car (an Aston Martin),  dont  worry,  he  wasn't driving.......he forgot to
    bring his scrolltext for Slam but he told me about it, its mainly about the
    Dick, and is very very  offensive........dont  read  it  if you have a weak
    heart........oh by the way,  did  you  know  the  Dick  (or  Rob James) was
    homosexual?  Yes, its true, when he came  round my house he kept trying to,
    erm, you know, he kept trying  to  (stop  laughing, this is a very delicate
    subject), ok I'll come straight out with it  - he kept trying to bum me and
    Flash  up,  we  had  to   chuck   him   out  because  he  couldn't  control
    himself......he also told us about his,  how  shall I put this, his bizarre
    activities which he participates in with his school friends, and jees, he's
    pretty friendly with 'em  if  ya  know  what  I mean...........ok enough of
    this, I just thought I should warn you  about  this guy if he phones you up
    and askes if he can come  (!!!)  round..........dont forget to get Slam for
    the full story.

    .............

    Ok all you coders out there, this ones for you......

    Powermans Coding Tips part 3 or 4 or whatever, who gives a shat anyway?
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    Drink lots of Sunkist,  not  Coke  because  it  makes  your mouth feel very
    strange after you've drank  too  much,  not  anything  alcoholic because it
    starts to taste like piss after a  while  (never mind, Flashbak Jack is the
    only one who'll understand this!), not tea or coffee either.......

    Listen to some ragga stylee  house  or  techno  with a hardcore stylee beat
    museeeek.......something  like  T99,  Quadrophonia,  Roobarb  and  Custard,
    Manix, Hypnotist, Cubic 22 etc.......if you  haven't got anything like this
    just chip down your local music store, bus down the door, walk in and say -
    hey  badboy,  gimme  some  wicked  house  chuuunes  or  me  gonna  bus  you
    up........come man, gimme de ting now  or me smack your face........if this
    doesn't work then just  say  -  please  may  I  have  some house records in
    exchange for an agreed  amount  of  English  currency.......if this doesn't
    work kick the guy  and  steal  some  records......check  out  a tune called
    Liquid, its amazing......

    When making a demo, the first thing  you  should do after you're loader has
    been installed (or before if you want)  is to clear the whole memory except
    the bit used by the  loader,  this  will  prevent any software rippers from
    working..... Also, set up a reset  vector  to  clear the whole memory, as a
    normal reset doesn't  do  this  for  you.......apparantly  Nexus's software
    ripper will rip anything,  even  if  you  clear  the  memory, so dont think
    clearing the memory will put you in the clear, it will just prevent all the
    lame software rippers from working....

    Ok thats enough tips, you didn't think I  was going to give away any really
    useful tips like plotting 700 vectorballs  with a 16khz soundtrack did you?
    (see the next TWB megademo......).  I'm  listening to some awesome tunes at
    the moment, ting is MENTAL!!!!!   I  dont  care  what anyone thinks, theres
    nothing like pure hardcore techno to get your brain buzzin'.........

    ........

    Hey Dick of SPI, dont bother looking  for your crup loading graphics in the
    Enterprise megademo, I told Nexus not to  use  them because (and I'll be as
    subtle as I can) they are absolutely SHAT!  Oh, and dont bother looking for
    any of your shat (jees Mat, this no swearing rule is a right basta- a right
    pain), TWB logos in any of  my  demos,  you call youself a graphics artist,
    even I could do better........hehehehe how da feel Dick........

    .........

    I was talking to Flashbak  Jack  yesterday,  he  told  me how shat an album
    called Atomizer was so all techno  freaks  do  not buy this shat album!  He
    also read out his scrolltext for Slam, all I can say is that it must be the
    most  offensive scroller ever written, hey  Dick  you're gonna cry when you
    read dis boyeeee, if Slam is already out you'll all know what I mean!

    ..........

    One quick messge to  the  guy  from  the  Pixel  Twins  who  coded the sync
    scroller on Ledgers 9 - I have  every  right  to boast about my 10 scanline
    sync scroller, seeing as at the time  when it was coded sync scrollers were
    not as common as  they are today  (these  days  anyone can get hold of one,
    when I coded mine I  had  no  help  at  all,  I  had to code it myself...).
    Anyway, what I'm saying is that I  can  boast because I had a sync scroller
    before most British crews, and at the  time  most people were using 14 line
    and 20 line sync scrollers, so  10  scanlines was considered fast!  Oh, and
    my latest sync scroller only  takes  5120  cycles,  yours takes about 22000
    (you waste about 17000 cycles at the beginning of the VBL just waiting in a
    loop!). So there!

    One more thing, hey you guys from  the late Ultra Crew (hssshsshs...), have
    you got that  great  chip  tracker  Tri  Sound?  I  have,  and  some replay
    routines, and no you cant have them!  hehehehehe....

    Ok I'm outta here, see ya'll in  Slam  or in P.O.P's forthcoming demo (I've
    done a guest screen), dont forget  to  look  out  for  a game called Cool J
    Charlie, and if you are offered a pirate  copy,  give the guy a kick up the
    backside, and a knife wound across  the  throut  and  a bullet in the head,
    from me......

                                    Over and Out

                                   Powerman of TWB

                           Hey yo Dick, you're a dead man...

                                 Yo Dick, you stink...

                            Oh, and get a decent haircut...

                             Sort out your clothes aswell...

                      know what I'm saying....

                           Peace(\/)

              TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT   WWW           WWW   BBBBBBBBBBBBBBB
              TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT   WWW           WWW   BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB
                     TTT          WWW     W     WWW   BBB          BBB
                     TTT          WWW   WW WW   WWW   BBBBBBBBBBBBBBB
                     TTT          WWW  WW   WW  WWW   BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB
                     TTT          WWW WW     WW WWW   BBB          BBB
                     TTT          WWWWW       WWWWW   BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB
                     TTT          WWW           WWW   BBBBBBBBBBBBBBB

                          Forever....



    ----------------------------------------------------------------------

Scrolltext to "Slam (Another Hardcore Jam)"

THIS DEMO MAY NOT BE REVIEWED IN ST FORMAT OR PUBLIC DOMAIN, IF YOU DO I'LL SUE
YOUR ASS.......        WELCOME TO  SLAM,  THE  SEQUEL  TO  THE AMAZING HARDCORE
DANCEFLOOR......... THIS DEMO WILL PROBABLY  BE  MORE  FAMOUS FOR ITS OFFENSIVE
SCROLLTEXT THAN THE MUSIC, BUT ANYWAY IF  THE  TICK  OR THE SPY IS READING DIS,
READ ALL DIS TEXT IF YOU DARE........... OK THIS IS THE FIRST TWB DEMO SINCE WE
STARTED CODING ON THE AMIGA, SO EVERYONE WHO  KEPT SAYING WE HAD QUITTED THE ST
CAN SEE THAT ITS NOT TRUE AT ALL, WE ARE AN ST AND AMIGA CREW..... FIRST THINGS
FIRST, THE CREDITS  -  CODING  BY  POWERMAN,  SOUNDTRACK  ROUT FROM PROTRACKER,
GRAFIX BY MAGNUM, AWESOME MUZIX BY THE DEMON  X AND AGAIN THE TITLE WAS THOUGHT
UP BY FLASHBAK JACK.......... OK,  LETS  TALK  ABOUT  WHAT  TWB HAVE BEEN UP TO
SINCE HARDCORE DANCEFLOOR. BY  THE  WAY,  DID  YOU  SEE  THE REVIEW OF HARDCORE
DANCEFLOOR IN PUBLIC DOMAIN MAGAZINE? FOR A  START THEY SAID 808 STATE PDL WERE
RESPONSIBLE FOR THE DEMO, THEN THEY SAID  THAT THE 5 TRACKS WEREN'T ENOUGH, AND
TO TOP IT ALL OFF THEY  MADE  IT  SOUND  AS  IF  WE  JUST SAMPLED 5 TRACKS FROM
BEGINNING TO END.........HEY FUTURE  PUBLISHING,  Y'ALL  ARE  A  BUNCH OF SORRY
LOOSERS, LIKE THE DICK OF SPI.........OK,  LETS  GET BACK TO TALKING ABOUT TWB.
OUR GAME  IS  REALLY  COMING  ALONG  NICELY  NOW......I'VE  SENT  A  PREVIEW TO
RENEGADE, AND I'VE STARTED THE AMIGA  CONVERSION. THE DIGITISED MUSIC IS REALLY
GOOD, THE AMIGA VERSION WILL HAVE DIGITISED  MUSIC  ALL THE WAY THROUGH, THE ST
VERSION HAS CHIP MUSIC WHILE  YOU'RE  PLAYING.  SPEAKING  OF  CHIP MUSIC, A GUY
CALLED NEXUS (WHOS DOING THE ENTERPRISE MEGADEMO, ALL ENTERPRISE MEMBERS SHOULD
SEND ME THEIR SCREENS AND I'LL PASS  THEM  ON)  CAME  ROUND A FEW WEEKS AGO AND
AGREED TO DO THE CHIP MUSIC FOR  MY  GAME.  AFTER SEVERAL CRASHES WE MANAGED TO
GET HIS CHIP MUSIC DRIVER WORKING WITH  MY  GAME.  I MUST MENTION THAT THE BASS
ON HIS TUNES IS VERY GOOD, IT EVEN  RIVALS  COUNT ZEROS BASS SOUND!  AND NO, IT
DOESN'T USE SAMPLES.......OK, NOW THE INTERESTING BIT  - MY GAME WILL BE CALLED
COOL J CHARLIE, AND OUR DEVELOPMENT  NAME  IS  WILD DESIGNS. THE STORY HAS BEEN
CREATED BUT ITS NOT FINALISED  YET........OK,  I'LL  STOP TALKING ABOUT MY GAME
NOW, BUT I HAVE JUST ONE THING  TO  SAY  - PLEASE DONT PIRATE IT, OR DISTRIBUTE
PIRATE COPIES BECAUSE IF YOU DO  I'LL  KICK YOUR ASS..........BUT SERIOUSLY, IF
YOU WANT TO KEEP PLAYING SLOW GAMES  WITH JERKY SCROLLING, SHIT GRAFIX AND EVEN
WORSE  SOUND,  JUST  PIRATE  OUR   GAME   AND   WE'LL  GIVE  AMIGA  OWNERS  OUR
GAMES.........DONT PIRATE OUR GAME AND  WE'LL  KEEP  MAKING ST GAMES......SO DO
THE RIGHT THING.........OK LETS  TALK  ABOUT  THE NEXT TWB MEGADEMO.......OOPS!
DID I SAY MEGADEMO?  ERRRM, WHAT I MEANT WAS,  OHHH OK, THE CATS OUT OF THE HAT
(???) NOW SO YES ITS TRUE, THERE WILL  BE  ANOTHER TWB MEGADEMO. I WAS GOING TO
KEEP IT A SECRET, BECAUSE IT WILL CONTAIN A FEW THINGS NEVER SEEN BEFORE ON THE
ST, AND WILL HAVE A VERY NICE 3D DEMO, BUT I SUPPOSE THERE'S NO HARM IN TELLING
YOU THERE WILL BE A  THIRD  TWB  MEGADEMO,  I'M  JUST  NOT  GOING TO REVEAL ANY
DETAILS. IT SHOULD BE FINISHED IN A FEW MONTHS HOPEFULLY, SHORTLY AFTER MY GAME
IS RELEASED ANYWAY. I'VE BEEN DOING  SOME  AMIGA  CODING LATELY, MAINLY MY GAME
BUT SOME FILLED 3D CODE AS WELL.  THE  AMIGA  IS VERY EASY TO CODE, BECAUSE THE
HARDWARE DOES EVERYTHING FOR YOU, WHICH MEANS YOU CAN CONCENTRATE MORE ON IDEAS
AND GOOD EFFECTS INSTEAD OF  ALWAYS  WORRYING  ABOUT CPU TIME........ HEY, HAVE
YOU NOTICED THE LACK OF COLOUR FLICKERING ON  THIS SCROLLER? (THIS IS A 1 PLANE
SCROLLER WITH RASTERS). READ LEDGERS 7 TO  FIND  OUT HOW ITS DONE. OK LETS HAVE
SOME GREETS, WHICH GO TO THE UNTOUCHABLES  (HEY TONY, THANKS FOR AGREEING TO DO
A SCREEN!), FUTURE  MINDS,  FUZION  (MACDOS,  I'LL  USE  YOUR  GFX  IN  MY NEXT
MEGADEMO!), SKA (CANT  WAIT  FOR  YOUR  VECTOR  DEMO!),  TOUR  DE  FORCE, NATO,
TERMINATORS, INNER CIRCLE, FLEXICHRON, DNT CREW,  AND ALL OTHER DECENT CREWS ON
THE ST...........MEGA SUPER DOOPA  KISS  MY  ASS  GREETS  TO  THE DICK AND SPY.
ANYONE WHOS READ THE MUTANT MONTHLY  6  ARTICLE  IN  LEDGERS 7 WILL KNOW WHY WE
DETEST THE DICK......OF COURSE NONE  OF  WHAT  HE  SAID  IS TRUE, ANYONE STUPID
ENOUGH TO BELIEVE HIM IS JUST AS  IMMATURE  AND  CHILDISH AS HE HIS. HOWEVER, I
FEEL IT IS MY DUTY TO SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT, NOT THAT TWB HAVE ANY OBLIGATION
TO DEFEND OURSELVES FROM A LITTLE  SHIT  LIKE THE DICK YOU UNDERSTAND..........
ANYWAY I WILL SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT  FOR  THOSE  OF  YOU WHO WANT TO HEAR THE
TRUTH FROM ME. FIRST OF ALL, THE BIT  ABOUT ME BUYING FLASHBAK JACK AN AMIGA IN
RETURN FOR SEXUAL FAVOURS. WHAT I  ACTUALLY  SAID  TO  THE  DICK WAS THAT I WAS
GOING TO BUY FLASH AN AMIGA IF  HE  PLAYTESTED  AND DESIGNED SOME LEVELS FOR MY
GAME. HOWEVER, THE DICK MUST HAVE BEEN DAY DREAMING ABOUT BUMMING UP ONE OF HIS
BOYFRIENDS,  WHICH  IS  PROBABLY  WHY  HE  DIDN'T  CATCH  ALL  OF  WHAT  I  WAS
SAYING.......... NOW, THE WORST THING THAT THE  DICK SAID WAS THAT I STOLE CODE
FOR STATE OF THE ART!  OK, I  ADMIT, THE NOISETRACKER REPLAY ROUTINE IS RIPPED,
BUT I ADMIT THAT IN AT LEAST ONE SCROLLER,  AND ONLY A FEW PEOPLE USE THEIR OWN
MODULE PLAYERS ANYWAY, BUT APART FROM  THAT  AND  THE GUEST SCREEN, EVERY OTHER
BYTE OF CODE IS  ORIGINAL  CODE  BY  ME,  ALL  THESE  PEOPLE  THAT THE DICK WAS
SUPPOSEDLY TALKING TO WHO SAID THAT  I  RIPPED  CODE HAD BETTER SORT THEMSELVES
OUT.................. SO, LETS  FINISH  THIS  DICK  BUSINESS  WITH  A SHORT BUT
MEANINGFUL MESSAGE TO THE DICK -  I  DONT  KNOW  WHAT  YOUR PROBLEM IS, BUT YOU
WANNA SORT OUT YOUR CLOTHES, SORT OUT  YOUR  HAIRCUT, SORT OUT YOUR SPOTS, SORT
OUT  YOUR  FACE,  SORT  OUT  YOUR   LIFE.........  LETS  TALK  ABOUT  SOMETHING
ELSE.......... THE HIDDEN SCREEN IN STATE  OF  THE  ART!  THERE ISN'T ONE GUYS,
SORRY TO LET Y'ALL DOWN LIKE THAT,  BUT  THERES  NO HIDDEN SCREEN. I DECIDED TO
OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCE THIS BECAUSE THERE  ARE  CERTAIN  PEOPLE AND PROBABLY A LOT
MORE WHO HAVE WASTED  SO  MUCH  TIME  JUMPING  UP  AND  DOWN  ON THE MAIN MENU,
PRESSING SPACE IN EVERY POSSIBLE POSITION  WHILE  IN MID AIR, THINKING THAT THE
FACT THAT THE WIZARD CAN JUMP HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE HIDDEN SCREEN.......
THERE MIGHT BE A HIDDEN SCREEN IN OUR  NEXT  MEGADEMO THOUGH. OK, PEEP THIS - A
GUY CALLED DJ KID (WHO DID THE SAMPLING  ON  MY FULLSCREEN IN STATE OF THE ART)
ASKED ME TO MAKE A DEMO FOR A CONSOLE  SHOP  CALLED CES. I AGREED, IF I GOT TWO
FREE MEGADRIVE GAMES. HALF THE DEMO IS FINISHED, AND I DEMANDED ONE GAME NOW OR
ELSE I WOULDN'T FINISH THE DEMO. OF COURSE AFTER DES (THE OWNER OF CES) SAW THE
DEMO HE COULDN'T REFUSE, SO I NOW HAVE  SONIC THE HEDGEHOG ON MY MEGADRIVE!  BY
THE WAY, I HAVE FINALLY STOPPED DRIVING  MY  GOLF,  I NOW HAVE A BLACK XR3I, SO
THE NEXT TIME YOU SEE  ONE  DRIVING  ROUND  LONDON  WITH  SOME BAD STYLEEE TUNE
COMIN' OUT THE SPEAKERS, IT'LL PROBABLY  BE  ME AND JACK........ RIGHT THEN, DO
YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY WE  MADE  HARDCORE  DANCEFLOOR AND THIS DEMO?  ITS BECAUSE
FLASHBAK JACK, THE DEMON X AND I  THINK  PURE HARDCORE TECHNO AND HOUSE IS JUST
AMAZING, MAGNUM IS MORE INTO HEAVY  METAL.  HOWEVER,  THE  DEMON X IS ALSO VERY
GOOD AT OTHER TYPES OF MUSIC (CHECK OUT  OUR GAME WHEN ITS FINISHED). HE'S DONE
SOME MEGADRIVE MUSIC CONVERSIONS AND  2  AMAZING SLAYER CONVERSIONS!  YES, HE'S
DONE 2 OF THE BEST THRASH METAL CONVERSIONS  EVER  ON THE ST, EXPECT TO HEAR AT
LEAST ONE (PROBABLY DIE BY THE SWORD)  ON  OUR NEXT MEGADEMO, AND I'LL PROBABLY
USE AT LEAST ONE MEGADRIVE TUNE AS  WELL,  BUT THERE WILL CERTAINLY BE A REALLY
GOOD HARDCORE TECHNO TRACK. THE NEXT  TWB  DEMO  WILL BE THE LONG AWAITED DIGI-
SYNTH 8, WHICH WILL PROBABLY BE CALLED  WAVEFORMS. IT'LL BE THE BEST DIGI-SYNTH
YET.............. WELL, THIS IS MY BIT OVER WITH, AND NOW THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL
BEEN WAITING FOR, FLASHBAK JACKS  SCROLLTEXT,  DEDICATED  TO  THE DICK OF SPLIT
INFINITY. BEFORE I GO THOUGH, HERES A  MESSAGE  TO THE DICK - IF YOU'RE LOOKING
FOR TROUBLE JAMES, YOU'VE FOUND IT, JACK  IS  NOT THE KINDA PERSON YOU WANNA GO
OFFENDING........I'M OUTTA HERE,  HERES  THE  JACK  MAN HIMSELF.........SEE YAS
LATER................. SLAM ANOTHER HARDCORE JAM.  YES LADS ITS HERE THE SEQUEL
TO HARDCORE DANCEFLOOR. THIS ONE  WASN'T  COMING  OUT  FOR  A  FEW MONTHS BUT I
PERSUADED POWERMAN TO STYLE IT  OUT  AND  GET  IT  FINISHED BECAUSE I WANTED TO
WRITE A SCROLLTEXT. WARNING  WARNING  WARNING  THIS  NEXT  BIT OF SCROLLTEXT IS
CALCULATED TO OFFEND.  YO TICK YOU  REACHING  THIS?   I HOPE SO BECAUSE I GONNA
DISTRESS YOU. LET ME TELL YOU A  FEW  TINGS  ABOUT TICK - THE GUYS FAT, DRESSES
LIKE A TRAMP, SMELLS, GOT MORE SPOTS THAN SOMEONE WITH THE MEASELS AND HE'S GOT
A 70'S STYLE HAIR CUT.  TICK THAT  WAS  FOR STARTERS.......IT WAS A BIG MISTAKE
TRYING TO DISTRESS ME.  THE TICK SAID I WAS  QUEER, BUT TICK IF I'M QUEER WHY I
AM I FUCKING YOU MUM TELL ME THAT  EH..........DONT WORRY LADS IT WAS SHIT, ITS
NOT WORTH GOING DOWN THERE FOR  A  SHAG,  BUT  IF  YOU'RE LUCKY AND GET DOWN TO
KINGS CROSS EARLY ENOUGH YOU  MIGHT  JUST  CATCH  HER.   IF  YOU GO TO VICTORIA
STATION YOU MIGHT FIND HIS GREASY OLD  MAN  LOOKING AT THE WOMEN OR SELLING HIS
BODY AS A RENT BOY. I DONT KNOW IF THE FAT BASTARD TICK HAS GOT ANY BROTHERS OR
SISTERS SO I CANT CUSS THEM........NOW TICK  YOU FAT SHIT, STOP EATING AND READ
THIS......I THINK I'LL STOP CUSSING YOU NOW,  HAVE YOU LEARNT YOU'RE LESSON?  I
HOPE SO BECAUSE IF YOU HAVEN'T YOU  GONNA  GET  IT GOOD NEXT TIME.  FAT BOY YOU
STARTED THIS AND I'M FINISHING IT.  I THINK  I'LL LEAVE IT AT THAT FOR NOW TICK
BUT IF YOU CUSS  ME  AGAIN  I  WONT  JUST BE CUSSING YOU.......................
ANYONE GO TO THE LIVING DREAM RAVE?  IT WAS  MENTAL, IF YOU MISSED IT YOU ARE A
MUG.  BIG SHOUT GOING OUT TO SIMON  G,  GAVEN  P  AND JAMES P. JAMES, MESSAGE -
FUCK COMPTON.  ANYWAY TIME TO  GO,  I'VE  SAID  MY PIECE.......IF TICK TRIES IT
AGAIN, BOY, HE IS GONNA GET IT. LATER HERE'S POWERMAN...............OK THANKS A
LOT JACK, HEY TICK YOU TESTED US, YOU'VE  SEEN  WHAT WE CAN DO, NEXT TIME IT'LL
BE A LOT MORE THAN A  FEW  RETURN  SLAGGINGS..........WHILE WE'RE ABOUT IT, HOW
ABOUT SLAGGING OF THE SPY  OF  THE  UNTOUCHABLES..........HEY SPY, DONT PLAY ME
COS YOU DONT KNOW WHAT  YOU'RE  GETTING  YOURSELF  INTO.....JUST  TO GIVE YOU A
TASTE, I'M GONNA COAT YOU WITH  SOME  NASTY WORDS BOYEEE..........WHY SEND ME A
REALLY SHIT ENTERPRISE LOGO MAN?  WHY, THE  TING WAS CRAP! WHY SAY YOU'RE INTRO
IS MORE PROFESSIONAL THAN MINE, ITS NOT PROFESSIONAL TO RIP OTHER PEOPLES CODE.
WHY SAY ITS BETTER MAN?  AT LEAST ALL MY CODE IS ORIGINAL, AT LEAST I DONT TEEF
UP OTHER PEOPLES WORK............YO SPY YOU'RE  NOTHING BUT A LITTLE SHIT HEAD,
IF I EVER MEET  YOU  I  SWEAR  I  WILL  KICK  THE  SHIT  WELL  AND TRULY OUT OF
YOU..........I FEEL SORRY FOR YOUR PARENTS  GUY,  I  BET THEY CALLED YOU JETHRO
BECAUSE THEY HATE YOU SO  MUCH.........HEY  SPY,  YOU'RE  A FUCKIN ARSEHOLE WHO
HASN'T GOT A CLUE ABOUT RESPECT, DONT TEST  ME  OR I'LL SMASH YOUR TEETH SO FAR
DOWN YOUR THROAT YOU'LL  HAVE  TO  STICK  A  TOOTHBRUSH  UP  YOUR ARSE TO CLEAN
EM............ OK ENOUGH COATING, I'M JUST  GOING TO FINISH OFF THIS SCROLLTEXT
AND GET OUTTA HERE......... I'M NOW LISTENING TO  A TAPE WITH SOME BAD TUNES ON
IT, FLASHBAK JACK MADE IT  FOR  ME  -  ITS  GOT  LIQUID  SWEET HARMONY (AND THE
REMIX), ALTERN 8 EVAPOR-8, FREQUENCY  AND  ARMOURGEDDON, PLUS LOADS MORE AWSOME
TUNES.........OK I GOTTA CRUISE, SEE YA'LL  IN  THE NEXT TWB MEGADEMO (OR DIGI-
SYNTH 8 WHICH WILL PROBABLY BE OUT SOONER).  SORRY TO ANYONE WHO WAS OFFENED BY
THE SCROLLER (EXCEPT THE TICK  AND  SPY  OF  COURSE,  WE  MEAN TO OFFEND THEM).
BEFORE I CHILL I'D JUST LIKE TO  SAY  THAT  THERE WILL BE NO MORE SLAGGING FROM
US, I THINK TICK AND SPY HAVE HAD  ENOUGH,  AND  SO HAVE I.  IF ANYONE WANTS TO
SLAG US THEN GO AHEAD, WE'LL JUST IGNORE YOU LIKE WE SHOULD HAVE DONE WITH TICK
AND SPY........... JUST ONE LAST MESSAGE TO  THE  TICK  AND SPY - GUYS, WHY ARE
YOUR LIVES SO BORING THAT YOU HAVE TO  GO  SLAGGING US FOR NO REASON JUST FOR A
BIT OF FUN.  YOU GUYS REALLY  ARE  PRETTY  SORRY,  AND  THATS NOT A CUSS, ITS A
FACT.................. CHECK YA'LL LATER................

         ------------------------------------------------------------

Article by TWB in Ledgers 11

<<  Coding tips from Powerman of TWB, part 6271438483643138
    -------------------------------------------------------

    Proper tips this time, not  like  the  previous  coding tips article I did.
    But first some general bullshat.......I've  just  finished coding the intro
    to the next Wild  Boys  megademo......the  demo  will  be called Reactiv-8,
    there is a reason for this so  get  the  demo when its released to find out
    why....its a pretty good intro,  1300  vectorballs  with 16khz sound, great
    graphics,  wicked  music  by  TDX,  this  will  be  a  demo  to  blow  your
    mind......anyway enough of the  sales  pitch  (not  that  this demo will be
    sold, it'll be public domain of   course..).  There might be an intro by me
    on this disk, or on a previous issue  of Ledgers. I'm talking about my 50hz
    3d demo anyway, which I coded after  seeing TUC's intro for Ledgers 9 (read
    my scrolltext for the full story....). I got a disk from Spy yesterday with
    a really crap Enterprise logo on it  as  well as a DOC file called APOLOGY.
    Some apology, it started by saying how  badly  coded the Wild Demo was, how
    he hates the way TWB show  off  and  how  we  think everything we do is the
    best!  He also talked about how  much  better  his  intro was to mine.  Hey
    spy, your intro may have had two parts  and digi-drums, but my 3d is bigger
    which means my 3d routs  are  faster  than  yours  (or Argonauts to be more
    precise but let me make it clear that I'm not having a go at Argonaut, just
    the spy), oh and spy I think  you  left  out one small detail: Argonauts 3d
    routs are ripped, mine aint so suck on that you son of a butch. Now, before
    we get on with this article proper,  a  word  about all the boasting in TWB
    demos: anyone who takes it seriously is an idiot, its only a bit of fun but
    we do have every right  to  boast  as  well:  we  were  at least the second
    British crew to beat  the  Carebears  fullscreen  (if  you  include the Wow
    scroller in the Decade demo, which  some  might  say is better than the TCB
    one), we have also produced the best  megademo for a single coder, State Of
    The Art was almost a  one  coder  demo  (I  did everything except the guest
    screen and soundtrack rout). But  we  dont  really  care what anyone thinks
    about the boasting, they are our demos  and  we'll say what the bloody hell
    we like no matter what  anyone  thinks  of  us...........incase some of you
    think that TWB are a bit out of line with all the recent cussing between us
    and the tick and the spy, let  me  say  that TWB members are great guys, we
    didn't start any of the wars and have never slagged off another crew unless
    they have done it to us first.

    ........

    Before the next tip lets have a  bit of bullshat........ok do you know what
    The Ticks top ten records are?  Before  I  tell  you, I better let you know
    that the Tick has a bit, well,  quite  a bit of a weight problem........hey
    Tick, have you tried Slimfast?  Ok his top ten records are.....

    1.  KLF - What time is lunch?
    2.  Right Said Fred - I'm too fat.
    3.  Michael Jackson - Eat it.
    4.  808 State - In your fat face.
    5.  Shamen - Move my fat butt.
    6.  Betty Boo - Doin the fat doo.
    7.  Technotronic featuring Ya Kid K - Rockin over my belly.
    8.  DJ Fats - Eat it up.
    9.  EMF - Unbelievably fat.
    10. Pavoroti - Nessun Dorma.

    ........

    Now lets have Ticks top ten films.......

    1.  AWOF - Absent without food.
    2.  Big Man.
    3.  Wanted: Dead or Alive.
    4.  Cannibal Fever.
    5.  Cookie.
    6.  The Thing.
    7.  Manhunter.
    8.  Misery.
    9.  Nightmare On Fat Street.
    10. The Blob.

    And lastly his top ten tv progs.......

    1.  Poridge.
    2.  The Cook Report.
    3.  Lunchtime News.
    4.  Masterchef.
    5.  Eggs N Baker.
    6.  Sumo.
    7.  Rosanne.
    8.  Jim'll Fix It (although he certainly wont be fixing Ticks problem).
    9.  Who's Fat Butt Is It Anyway?
    10. Eatenders.

    Ok a quick message to poor Tick - incase we have offended you I'd just like
    to say - HAAAHAAAHAAAA  you  fat  bostard!   Serves you right........hehehe
    hahaha!     >>

         -------------------------------------------------------------

Article by Powerman on scrolltext writing in Ledgers 11

<<  Scrolltext writing, by the Man of Power, The Powerman
    -----------------------------------------------------

    Hey yo check it one time, this is an article on how to chat, if y'all wanna
    liven up your scrolltexts use some of these words, especially if you're a
    boring shit like spy....

    PEEP DIS -          Phrase used a lot  by  the  Fresh  prince, means listen
                        carefully to what I'm about to say.

    RESPECT TO THAT (or just RESPECT) - means, erm, respect.....

    CHECK IT -          means nothing, just a couple of  words you use when you
                        cant think of anything else to write.

    LISTEN UP Y'ALL -   used when you wish to draw you audiences attention to a
                        matter of international importance.

    HERE WE GO Y'ALL -  used  to  signal  the  start  of  a  scroller  and  the
                        beginning of  the  journey  upon  which  you  and  your
                        audience are about to embark.

    Scrolltext end phrases
    ----------------------

    Now, here are some scrolltext endings  for  you,  if you're fed up with the
    old LETS WRAP, or LETS WARP (why  the  hell do people even say that?), LETS
    LOOP etc......try some of these:

    OVER AND OUT -  means your over and  out,  so  you  wont be writing anymore
                    text, signalling the end of the scroller and the subsequent
                    returning to the start.

    CHILL OUT - means stop reading this boring scroller and chill....

    I'M OUTTA HERE, LATER - means the scrolltext writer  is  pissed off, and is
                            getting 'outta  here'  (leaving  the  room)  to  do
                            something    more    relaxing    than    scrolltext
                            writing....the 'later' implies  that the scrolltext
                            writer will infact return to his computer and write
                            more scrolltext later.

    WE OUTTA HERE, LATERS - see above, except  the  LATERS  is  used instead of
                            LATER as a certain number of people are leaving the
                            room (see the WE at the start), LATERS implies that
                            more than one  person  will  return  and write some
                            more scrolltext.

    CHECK Y'ALL LATER -     implies that you will be  returning to the keyboard
                            later, leaving your audience in incredible suspense
                            as they wait for your next scrolltext.

    Ok thats it as far as words are concerned, dont use them too much or you'll
    start to sound like me or Jack.......and you dont want that do you?

    Before I go, heres some words from a  song  I heard on Kiss FM - Its taking
    the piss out of a tune called  Toms  Diner,  so sing this song with a ragga
    stylee accent, to the tune of Toms Diner...

    I was standing in the corner, searching for my Rizzla

    I had some Marawana, I needed to get higher

    So I went up to  the  corner  with  my  Rizzla  and my gunja, built another
    spliff until I was totally out of my head........da da daa da,da da daa da,
    da da daa da da da daa da.....

    It might not sound that funny, you  have  to  hear it for yourself which is
    why I might sample  it  for  Dreamzone  (our megademo!).......see ya's next
    time...

         -------------------------------------------------------------

Article by 7T7 of The Pixel Twins in Ledgers 11.

<<                                   7T7 HAS A GO
                           7T7 of the Pixel Twins hits out.

        It has come to my attention that  certain people in the demo scene have
    been slagging off our routines. I won't mention any names, but Powerman (or
    whoever does his scollers) has to be the biggest arsehole around.
        Firstly, the Highlander has had his  sync scroll routines criticised by
    Powerman, who said that they  were  so  many  clock  cycles slower than his
    ones. Well, the Highlander didn't know  exactly  how many clock cycles long
    his routine was, he just knew that it was so many scanlines faster then his
    previous one. If the  Powerman  knows  exactly  how  many  clock cycles the
    Highlander's routine runs  at,  then  he  must  have  tried  to  rip it for
    himself. It's obviously a lot  better  then  his  older sync scroll routine
    that came out just after the release of the Lost Boys Mindbomb source which
    included a sync scroll routine on the disk. (What a coincidence Powerman.)
        Another thing that the Powerman has  been  going  on about is DML's 3D.
    Well hell's bells Powerman, at least DML  can  do larger ojects then you at
    50 frames a second on a normal  ST.  I  hear  that you and the rest of your
    bunch have gone down to  the  Amiga.  Well  at  least with all those custom
    chips that it has, you might be able to do something that looks faster than
    the 3D that you do at the moment. Why  not try and do some light sourced 3D
    like DML did in the Stupendous  demo,  or  how  about some fill patterns as
    well?? Our next demo will have 3D shapes  with fill patterns in. Oh yes, it
    will be done in STOS and the 3D is  100%  by DML. And even in STOS, it will
    still be faster then the stuff  that  you  do  in assembly. (When I say the
    stuff that you do, I  really  mean  the  stuff  that you rip from everybody
    else.)
        Stick to the kind of writing that you're good at. The kind that needs a
    crayon.
        We do demos to entertain, we  don't  do  them for spotty merchants like
    you to to critise. Just wait until  you  see the next project. Try and take
    the piss out of that if you want to  look really bad, and a lot sadder then
    you already do.

           ---------------------------------------------------------

Response and more stuff by Powerman in Ledgers 12

<<  A vaguely interesting artcile by someone called Powerman...
    -----------------------------------------------------------

    .....

    Its 8 July 1992, tomorrow  me  and  Jack  (and  some  of our aunts, uncles,
    parents etc....the whole posse)  are  going  to  Spain,  so I'm quite bored
    today seeing as I've done my packing, theres  shit on TV and I've looked at
    all my new demos.......so I  resorted  to  reading  back issues of Ledgers.
    They were quite good, even if I  had already read them.....I came across an
    article by some cheif about his top 10  demos and news about the demo world
    so I thought I'd do  an  article  like that.......but first something about
    our trip to Spain.......the  last  time  we  went,  I  was doing Spanish at
    school, so everyone kept asking me  how  to say stuff in Spanish......now I
    saw this as an opportunity to have some fun......when asked how to say 'one
    coffee with milk' I would tell  them  to  say  - Soy un caballo.....I'm not
    sure if thats what I said, its been a  long time, but anyway I told them to
    say I AM A HORSE (but in Spanish of course) (I think it means I AM A HORSE,
    I'm not that sure.....).  The only  problem  was I couldn't keep a straight
    face and they sussed me out.....I would have liked to tell them to swear in
    Spanish but they dont  teach  you  that  in  GCSE Spanish.......I'm looking
    forward to going to the  Aquapark,  its  well  good, theres a massive water
    slide which is about 40 feet  high  and  goes  straight down at an angle of
    about 50 degrees!  Not only that,  but  the  women walk around topless, and
    not  old  women  either!    I'm   talking   20   year   old  tanned  flesh,
    everywhere....... not that  I'm  a  perv  or  anything,  but  you cant help
    looking especially when they walk infront of you with no warning.....

    Ok, lets talk about demos, here  are  my  top  10  demos of all time: (they
    aren't based on technical excellence, just  whether  or not I like watching
    them).

        1.  Cuddly demo -   This was a classic, its  old  but  for its time was
                            really   amazing....
        2.  Ooh Crikey what a Scorcher - I think this demo speaks for itself!
        3.  Decade demo -   Great count zero chip and Quartet music really made
                            this demo stand out...
        4.  Hardcore Dancefloor -   Yes, I know its one  of  mine but the music
                                    is really  amazing  if  your  into hardcore
                                    stuff like me...
        5.  Punish Your Machine -   Loads of screens in  this  demo  by all the
                                    best crews, enough said....
        6.  Mindbomb -  Again, for its time this was a great demo...
        7.  State Of The Art -  You might think  I'm  being  biased  but I dont
                                care, I still load  up  this  demo now and then
                                and I like it!
        8.  Slam -  The music is a bit too hardcore for me, thats why this demo
                    is number 8, but I still like it....
        9.  Stupendous demo  -  Even though I  haven't  seen  the  STE screens,
                                what I have seen is pretty nice....
        10. Pandemonium - For the 3d textured polygons.....

    Some other demos I like are  Energy  For  You, European demos, Light Speed,
    Lifes a bitch, Union demo, Overdrive, Dark Side of the Spoon......

    ...........

    Top Five Coders
    --------------

    Ok I'll tell you who I  think  are  the  5  best  coders  on the ST, I wont
    mention myself anywhere because it will cause problems, especially if I put
    myself above someone else and they start slagging me....

        1.  Nick of TCB -   Haven't seen much from this  guy lately but hey, he
                            invented hardware scrolling on the ST, thats enough
                            for me.....
        2.  Ziggy of OVR -  Because of his 3d...
        3.  The Fate -      Have you seen Dark Side of  the Spoon?  This guy is
                            also pretty good at chip music...
        4.  Gunstick -      See above (scrap the chip music bit)
        5.  Manikin -       Because of his fractal main menu...

    Top 5 Musicians
    ---------------

        1.  Count Zero  -   Not suprising really, I think  his chip music beats
                            everyone elses and the music on Things Not To Do is
                            one of my all-time favourites.
        2.  The Demon X -   So he's a TWB  member,  but  the  reason I took him
                            onboard  was  because  of  his  amazing  talent  at
                            reproducing hardcore soundtracks almost perfectly.
        3.  Mad Max     -   These days his tunes are  getting very similar, but
                            in the old days I loved his music...
        4.  An Cool     -   See the M Demo 3 review above!
        5.  Nexus       -   Wait for our game and megademo to see why!

    .......

    Tsk....just realised, tommorrow is the last  day  I'll  get to drive my car
    for 2 weeks, unless when we get to  spain  Jack  can teef us up a car so we
    can go joyriding......

                ------------------------------------------------------

    .... Oh yeah, I also got a  letter  from  Argonaut saying he didn't want to
    keep slagging me so I'm going to write to  him and tell him I feel the same
    way, so TWB are  not  enemies  with  anyone,  and  never  again will we get
    involved with any type of slagging.....  its just such a waste....... while
    reading Ledgers 11 I noticed two artciles about  me, one by some guy of the
    Unknowns (the Pascal thing) and another by  7T7. This guy from the Unknowns
    is obviosly a very disturbed person,  I  dont  know  what his problem is, I
    dont even know the guy, but whatever  he's  got  against me I wish he would
    come out with it and not write  childish  articles about stabbing me up and
    shit.......and now what about this artcile by 7T7?  Let me say something to
    this guy - the only reason I criticised Highlanders sync scroller by saying
    it wasted about 17000 cycles just waiting  in  a loop was because he said I
    boast about my sync scroller.......this was  not  true (and even if it was,
    he has no right to  say  such  a  thing).   All  I've  said is that my sync
    scroller takes no more than 10 lines,  I've never said 'my sync scroller is
    faster than yours'  to  anyone,  that  would  be  boasting.....and 7T7 also
    questions how I know my sync scroller is faster than Highlanders, he says I
    must have ripped Highlanders  routine!   Hey  7T7,  Highlander released the
    source to his sync scroller on Ledgers, so no mate, I didn't rip it (what a
    fool....).  7T7 also said it was a bit  of  a coincidence that I had a sync
    scroller shortly after the  Mindbomb  demo  was released.......well if this
    guy had  half  a  brain  he'd  know  (because  I've  said  this  on several
    occasions) that TLB sent me their sync  scroller, I studied it and wrote my
    own routine which was twice as  fast,  the  only similarity between my rout
    and Manikins was that they both  use the same technique (removing different
    border combinations to  create  different  offsets),  which  is a technique
    every sync scroller uses so dont think I stole it from TLB or anything.....
    probably the most serious accusation made  by  7T7 was about me criticising
    the 3d routs of one of the  Pixel Twins...... the reason this accusation is
    so serious is because its  untrue,  I've  never  criticised any Pixel Twins
    3d.... ever...... and now I'd just like to say something - if anyone writes
    anymore of these  stupid  articles  like  7T7  did,  I  wont  waste my time
    defending myself, because you're not worth it....

    Well, thats all I've got to say about  these people, I'm not going to start
    slagging them or anything, they just  aren't  worth it........ a message to
    everyone reading this: if you don't  like  me,  or any other TWB member, or
    any of our demos etc.....just keep  it  to  yourself, if you slag us you'll
    just make yourself look bad.  We make demos because its fun, admittedly our
    two previous megademos gave us the image  of people with bad attitudes, who
    thought we were the worlds best,  but  we  didn't  expect people to take so
    much notice of the scrollers, we  were  having  a great laugh while writing
    the scrolltexts, we expected the  readers  of  these  scrollers to laugh as
    well.......

    So, I'll just finish this  business  with  these  words - I dont appreciate
    being slagged off, especially for things I  didn't do, but I'm not going to
    be offended by it, I  just  feel  sorry  for  the  people who write it.  If
    anyone has a problem with me or my  demos or anything, write to me and tell
    me what you dont like, dont  write  stupid  articles for Ledgers and hope I
    read it.... And remember, all the boasting  and showing off and other stuff
    in our scrollers is all just a laugh,  we  dont think the Wild Demo is even
    lame, its below that, and I  dont  think  State  Of  The Art is amazing, my
    serious opinion is that its good, I'd give it 80%, when you consider we had
    no gfx guy,  no musician,  one  coder  who  did  nearly everything, with no
    help, in just  6  months,  on  a  1  meg  ST,  with  only  1  drive, in hot
    weather.......and it was started about 18  months ago, you have to remember
    what the demo scene was like then......

    Ok enough of this serious talk, I'm  looking for good guest screens for our
    megademo, so please write to this address if you want to do one (or for any
    other reason, if its a slagging letter then I'll just burn it up.

    The Wild Boys/TWB/Powerman/Neil/Mr Powerman/Power (CHOOSE ONE!)

    131 Gunnersbury Avenue
    Acton
    London
    W3 8LE
    England       >>


That sounds like a fairly good note to end our nomination on.


                 --------------------------------------------

