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              * C O O K I N G * W I T H * J O L L Y * R O G E R *

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                     THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO KILLING A CAR!

                              by The Jolly Roger

 There are 1001 ways to destroy a car  but  I  am going to cover only  the ones
that are the most fun  (for  you),  the  most  destructive  (for them), and the
hardest to trace (for the cops).

-   Place thermite on the  hood,  light  it,  and  watch  it  burn all the  way
    through the pavement!

-   Tape a CO2 bomb to the hood, axel, gas tank, wheel, muffler,  etc.)

-   Put a tampon, dirt, sugar (this one  is  good!), a ping pong ball,  or just
    about anything that will dissolve in the gas tank.

-   Put potatoes,  rocks,  banannas,  or  anything  that  will  fit,  into  the
    tailpipe. [Exhaust to all you non-US citizens -EGBSS] Use a broom handle to
    stuff 'em up into the  tailpipe.

-   Put a long rag into the gas tank and light it...

-   Steal a key, copy it, replace it, and then steal the stereo.

-   Break into the car. Cut a thin metal ruler into a shape like  this:
             ----
             |  |
             |  |
             |  |
             | <
             ----

    Slide it into the outside window  and  keep  pulling  it back up until  you
    catch the lock cable which  should  unlock  the  door. This device  is also
    called a SLIM JIM. Now get the stereo, equalizer, radar  detector, etc. Now
    destroy the inside. (A sharp knife does wonders  on the seats!)

If you really detest someone, and I mean  detest,  here's a few tips on what to
do in your spare time.

-   Move the windshield wiper blades,  and  insert  and  glue tacks.  The tacks
    make lovely designs.

-   If your "friend" goes to  school  with  you,  Just  before  he comes out of
    school.  Light a lighter and then  put  it directly underneath his car door
    handle. Wait...Leave...Listen.  When you hear  a  loud "shit!", you know he
    made it to his car in time.

-   Remove his muffler and pour  approximately  1  Cup  of  gas  in it. Put the
    muffler back, then wait till their  car  starts.  Then you have a cigarette
    lighter.  A 30 foot long cigarette lighter.

-   This one is effective, and any fool can  do it.  Remove the top air filter.
    That's it!

-   Or a oldie but goodie: sugar in the gas tank.

-   Stuff rags soaked in gas  up  the  exhaust  pipe.  Then you wonder why your
    "friend" has trouble with his/her lungs.

-   Here's one that takes time and  many  friends.  Take his/her car then break
    into their house and reassemble it, in their living or bedroom.  Phun eh?

-   If you're into engines, say eeni mine moe and point to something and remove
    it. They wonder why something doesn't work.

There are so many others, but the real good juicy ones come by thinking hard.


                               -----------------

APPENDIX A - How to make a CO2 bomb

You need a CO2 cartidge out of a soda  dispenser for this. You will have to use
up the cartridge first by either shooting it  or whatever. With a nail, force a
hole bigger so as to allow  the   powder  and  wick  to fit in easily. Fill the
cartridge with black  powder and  pack  it  in  there  real good by tapping the
bottom of the  cartridge on a  hard  surface  (I  said TAP not SLAM!). Insert a
fuse.  I recommend a good water-proof cannon  fuse,  or an m-80 type fuse,  but
firecracker fuses work,  if  you  can  run  like  ....  [Yes,  very nice racist
analogy, Roger. Let's just say  very  fast!  -EGBSS!]  )  Now, light it and run
like hell! It does wonders for a row  of mailboxes (like the ones  in apartment
complexes), a car (place  under  the  gas  tank),  a   picture window (place on
window sill), a phone  booth  (place  right   under  the  phone),  or any other
devious place. This thing throws  shrapnel, and can make quite a mess!!


APPENDIX B - Thermite II... or A better way to make Thermite

Thermite is nasty shit. Here is a good and easy way to make it.  The first step
is to get some iron-oxide (which is RUST!).  Here  is  a good way to make large
quantities in a short time:

-   Get a DC convertor like the  one  used  on  a train set. Cut the  connector
    off, seperate the wires, and strip them both.

-   Now you need a jar of  water  with  a  tablespoon or so of sodium  chloride
    (which is SALT!) added to it. This makes the water  conductive.

-   Now insert both wires into  the  mixture  (I  am  assuming you  plugged the
    convertor in...) and let them sit for five minutes.  One of them will start
    bubbling more than the other. This is  the  POSITIVE(+) wire. If you do not
    do this test right, the final  product will be the opposite (chemically) of
    rust, which is RUST  ACID. You have  no  use  for this here (although it IS
    useful!).

-   Anyway, put the nail tied to the  positive  wire into the jar. Now  put the
    negative wire in the  other  end.  Now  let  it  sit  overnight  and in the
    morning scrape the rust off of the nail  & repeat until  you got a bunch of
    rust on the bottom of the glass. Be generous  with your rust collection. If
    you are going through the trouble  of   making  thermite, you might as well
    make a lot, right?

-   Now remove the excess water  and  pour  the  crusty solution onto a  cookie
    sheet. Dry it in the sun for  a  few hours, or inside  overnight. It should
    be an orange-brown  color  (although  I  have   seen  it  in many different
    colors! Sometimes the color gets fucked   up,  what  can I say... but it is
    still iron oxide!)

-   Crush the rust into a fine powder and  heat it in a cast-iron pot  until it
    is red. Now mix the pure iron  oxide with pure alluminum  filinos which can
    be bought or filed down by hand from an aluminum  tube or bar. The ratio or
    iron oxide to aluminum is 8 grams to 3  grams.

-   Congrats! You have just made THERMITE! Now, to light it...

-   Thermite requires a LOT  of  heat  (more  than  a  blow torch!) to  ignite.
    However, a magnesium ribbon (which  is  sorta  hard to find..  call around)
    will do the trick.  It takes the  heat from the  burning magnesium to light
    the thermite.

-   Now when you see your victim's car,  pour a fifty-cent sized pile  onto his
    hood, stick the ribbon in it,  and  light  the ribbon with  the blow torch.
    Now chuckle as you watch it  burn  through  the hood,  the block, the axle,
    and the pavement.  BE  CAREFUL!  The  ideal   mixtures  can vaporize CARBON
    STEEL! Another idea is to use  thermite  to  get into pay phone cash boxes.
    HAVE FUN!! -Jolly Roger-


APPENDIX C - The easiest way to hotwire cars

Get in the car. Look under the dash. If it enclosed, forget it  unless you want
to cut through it. If you do, do it  near the  ignition. Once you get behind or
near the ignition look for two  red  wires.  In older cars red was the standard
color, if not, look  for two matched pairs.  When you find them, cross them and
take  off!


APPENDIX D - Auto Exhaust Flamethrower

For this one, all you need is a  car,  a sparkplug, ignition wire and a switch.
Install the spark plug into  the  last  four  or  five inches of the tailpipeby
drilling a hole that the plug can  screw  into easily. Attach the wire (this is
regular insulated wire) to one side of  the  switch  and to the spark plug. The
other side of the switch is attached  to  the positive terminal on the battery.
With the car running, simply hit the  switch  and watch the flames fly!!! Again
be careful that no one is behind you!  I  have  seen some of these flames go 20
feet!!!

 APPENDIX E - Fuses

You would be surprised how many files are  out there that use what  falls under
the category of a "fuse." They assume  that  you just  have a few lying around,
or know where to get  them.  Well,  in  some   parts  of the country, fuses are
extremely hard to come by... so  this file tells you how to make your own. Both
fuses presented  here are fairly simple to make, and are fairly reliable.

SLOW BURNING FUSE ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (approx. 2 inches per minute)

    Materials needed:

    - Cotton string or 3 shoelaces
    - Potassium Nitrate or Potassium Chlorate
    - Granulated sugar

    Procedure:

    -   Wash the cotton string or  showlaces  in  HOT  soapy water, then  rinse
        with fresh water

    -   Mix the following together in a glass bowl:
        1 part potassium nitrate or potassium chlorate
        1 part granulated sugar
        2 parts hot water

    -   Soak strings or shoelaces in this solution

    -   Twist/braid 3 strands together and allow them to dry

    -   Check the burn rate to see how long it actually takes!!

FAST BURNING FUSE ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (40 inches per minute)

    Materials needed:

    - Soft cotton string
    - fine black powder (empty a few shotgun shells!)
    - shallow dish or pan

    Procedure:

    -   moisten powder to form a paste

    -   twist/braid 3 strands of cotton together

    -   rub paste into string and allow to dry

    -   Check the burn rate!!!


                                  -----------
Jolly Roger

